Our Elaine

Eulogy ~ Elaine Wisniewski ~ 30 April 2008 (Read by Heidi Hughes)

We are all here today to honor a beautiful young woman who has affected each of us in a special way.

I am Heidi Hughes, Sherry’s sister, and Elaine’s friend.

We have been in a state of disbelief since Friday. Like most of you, Sherry has been through a roller coaster of emotions. During this time, she has tried to gather her thoughts about Elaine, but the hurt has been debilitating. I have picked up and read pages that have been crumpled up and thrown across the room. I will do my best to capture the essence of her feelings.

Sherry met Elaine while serving in the US Navy. Together they traveled, danced, debated, charted their futures. Sherry describes Elaine as having a curious mind, cheerful outlook and amazing grace under pressure. She had a steely determination and unflinching courage which made her the most remarkable individual. Elaine had her opinions, and she was passionate about them…and she had a heart big enough for everyone…

The past few days Sherry has talked about the many lives that Elaine touched.

Seems like Elaine was everyone’s best friend. I know she me feel that way. Here I am, just the little sister, but Elaine always made me feel as though we were friends first. I was married four years ago in Melbourne Beach. While Sherry was my shoulder, Elaine was my rock. She didn’t miss a detail. While I forgot to bring the groom’s bowtie and cumber bun, Elaine was strategically positioning the bubble machine for maximum bubble coverage as guests would enter the reception area. Elaine gave without being asked. She was selfless.

Elaine established bonds with people she cared about. One of those unbreakable bonds was with Ken…The one man in Elaine’s life besides her father who truly held an influence over her.

I spent the other day with Marcin. It made me feel unusually close to Elaine. His love for her is evident, his loss is deep. I know that Sherry was very excited to help plan Elaine’s wedding with fellow bridesmaids, Michelle and Theresa, two friends whom Elaine loved dearly.

She’s told me about Elaine’s neighbors, a close knit community that has suffered a great loss…about Elaine’s Navy buddies, who know she can go from one of the guys to diva in a flash…about Elaine’s career colleagues and how proud she was to be a part of that team.

Beyond any doubt, the most important people in Elaine’s life were her parents. Don, Elaine was “Daddy’s Little Girl,”…She lived her life to the standards you set and the lessons you taught. She respected, admired, and adored you.

Geri, when Sherry first met you years ago, she noticed that Elaine and you were very much alike. From the battling toddler who would not stay in her car seat, through the stubborn adolescence, into adulthood, Elaine learned from you to be gracious, appreciative, and giving. She was always concerned about what you thought and loved you dearly.

Elaine’s name in French translates to “Shining Light.”

Light is a form of radiant energy – Radiant Energy! How better to define Elaine? Her brilliance would shine through that magnificent smile, her stunning hair and splendid dress made her entrance into any room luminous.

Light acts as a guide. Elaine was a mentor, for her friends, her co-workers, and her good buddies Austin and Alek, and so many others. Elaine also planned parties with fervor and energy. I will never forget Sherry’s 30th Birthday party. It was a surprise. We arrived at Elaine’s home and there was cake, music, decorations and surprise guests. Sherry was elated. Then, a knock at the door…here is a strapping young man dressed in a tuxedo wearing a chauffeur’s cap. Immediately, Sherry reflects…Elaine planned this party ~ so Sherry winks, takes the gentleman’s hand and says, I’M THE BIRTHDAY GIRL. The man blushes and says…I’m just the driver. When you were with Elaine, anything could happen!

Without Light, there is no photography. Elaine was an ardent photographer. And her adventures warranted it. She traveled the entire world. Thanks to Ken and Krissi we have this excellent slide show depicting her travels. By 32, Elaine had been to Diego Garcia, Alaska, Japan, Puerto Rico, Korea, Germany and throughout the Middle East.

Finally, light attracts Butterflies.

When I told my best friend about Elaine’s passing, she sent me a text message shortly after our call. It said: “We are caterpillars here on earth, eventually we have to turn into butterflies.” I found that comforting and forwarded the message on to Sherry who then reminded me of Elaine’s love for butterflies.

In preparing this tribute, I searched for an appropriate poem, one of them went like this:

For years, I remained hidden from view…Afraid to show myself, or my true colors ~~~I begin to unfold my wings, finding the courage, discovering my strength…Sparking…Radiant…I take flight!

How inappropriate! Elaine did not spread her wings Friday night, she did so over 30 years ago. Her mom shared with my sister a story of a nine month old girl in a swimming pool, who swam out of her mother’s arms and into the world. ~ Elaine’s Wings WERE wide open.